Courtship (3)

Last time I continued the discussion of courtship by sharing my own children’s choices. Here are the next two.
Nate knew Rachelle’s family for some years and often planned fun activities together as friends. When he felt God was wanting their second born to be his wife, he talk with the parents without telling her of his intentions. In fact, when her father told her, she was surprised. Her father asked her to search the Scripture and pray as long as she wanted until she knew God’s will. No contact between the two was allowed during this time. About two months later she agreed to marry him. They set up strict courting rules to protect their purity and reputation until marriage a few months later.
We didn’t always do it right. My daughter eloped against my wishes, even though she had made a courtship commitment to me and God several years earlier. The factors that led to this were both of our faults but the hurts were deep. For nine months we had no communication as I struggled between my own wounds and Biblical forgiveness. Finally we were able to work through the issues and be reconciled. Finally I was able to give their marriage my blessing. Today we are in good fellowship.
As I said, I failed in many ways in this situation. But, no matter how faltering and failing your father or mother are, this is NOT the way to handle the marriage issue. Your parents have invested thousands of hours and dollars and prayers in raising you, and they deserve your honor as you leave home and start your own. How you start your marriage is VERY important. You need God’s blessing through your parents on your marriage. That is the right way to begin.
Here’s some practical advice: work on your own spiritual depth, and trust God to bring into your life that person who will meet you at that level and grow with you in your knowledge of Him. Marriage and the space program have this in common: if you head in the right direction in the first place, its takes fewer mid-course corrections to keep you on track.
Those of us who are older ought to be praying for the young people in our church. Marriage is life’s second most important decision. Satan loves to ruin the potential of godly young people by getting them to marry the wrong person or in the wrong way. But God is greater and will direct your life as you trust Him.