Roles in Marriage- the Wife
A man once said to me, “Leading my home has been a lot like walking a Doberman. You think you’re in charge, but it’s a lot easier to just let her do what she wants.”
Sadly, this wife does not understand God’s design for her life. Genesis 2:18-24 gives us details about the creation of woman and the reason God did so. “And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him. . . And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof; And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man. And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.”
Though creation was ‘good’ and ‘very good’ by the time it was completed, before the woman was created, it was ‘not good’ for Adam to be alone. But instead of immediately creating the woman, God first commanded Adam to name the animals. This was not because God could not name them, but to ‘whet his appetite’, to show Adam what was missing before filling the need.
Eve was made to be Adam’s ‘help meet.’ This one Hebrew word is used 19 times in the Old Testament translated ‘help’ and connotes a similar idea to the Greek parakletos, ‘one called along side another for the purpose of aiding.’ This Greek word is used four times of the Holy Spirit, and once of Christ (1 John 2:1) Thus, in application, God’s main purpose in making woman, and the primary role of a wife, is to come alongside her husband to help him. God has called him to serve in specific ways and her role is to help him accomplish God’s goals for him.
That sounds easy and probably would be apart from Genesis 3. One consequence on Eve for the fall is given in this phrase: “. . . thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.” (3:16) The structure of the Hebrew sentence is identical to that of 4:7 where God says to Cain, “And unto thee shall be his (sin’s) desire, and (but) thou shalt rule over him (sin).” It is an antithetical expression and could be translated, “You will desire to control Adam; however, he is to rule over you.” This conflict, whether great or small, has continued to reek havoc on marital relationships ever since then. In contrast, it is a delight to meet a wife who understands and accepts this, her role and God’s perfect plan for her life. (Next week we will discuss the much harder role of the husband.)